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this_yearsboy
04 June 2009 @ 03:18 pm
 So I'm making a zine, but it's all ugly catharsis about how much I was in love with you or still am and I'm not sure how I feel about that. How can people read this? Why do you want me to visit so much, and will it just fuck with my head, 'cause I'm pretty fragile at the moment and that's the last thing I need. 
 
 
this_yearsboy
You came to me this morning
And you handled me like meat.
You´d have to live alone to know
How good that feels, how sweet.
My mirror twin, my next of kin,
I´d know you in my sleep.
And who but you would take me in
A thousand kisses deep?

I loved you when you opened
Like a lily to the heat.
I´m just another snowman
Standing in the rain and sleet,
Who loved you with his frozen love
His second-hand physique -
With all he is, and all he was
A thousand kisses deep.

All soaked in sex, and pressed against
The limits of the sea:
I saw there were no oceans left
For scavengers like me.
We made it to the forward deck
I blessed our remnant fleet -
And then consented to be wrecked
A thousand kisses deep.

I know you had to lie to me,
I know you had to cheat.
But the Means no longer guarantee
The Virtue in Deceit.
That truth is bent, that beauty spent,
That style is obsolete -
Ever since the Holy Spirit went
A thousand kisses deep.

(So what about this Inner Light
That´s boundless and unique?
I´m slouching through another night
A thousand kisses deep.)

I´m turning tricks; I´m getting fixed,
I´m back on Boogie Street.
I tried to quit the business -
Hey, I´m lazy and I´m weak.
But sometimes when the night is slow,
The wretched and the meek,
We gather up our hearts and go
A thousand kisses deep.

(And fragrant is the thought of you,
The file on you complete -
Except what we forgot to do
A thousand kisses deep.)

The ponies run, the girls are young,
The odds are there to beat.
You win a while, and then it´s done -
Your little winning streak.
And summoned now to deal
With your invincible defeat,
You live your life as if it´s real
A thousand kisses deep.

(I jammed with Diz and Dante -
I did not have their sweep -
But once or twice, they let me play
A thousand kisses deep.)

And I´m still working with the wine,
Still dancing cheek to cheek.
The band is playing "Auld Lang Syne" -
The heart will not retreat.
And maybe I had miles to drive,
And promises to keep -
You ditch it all to stay alive
A thousand kisses deep.

And now you are the Angel Death
And now the Paraclete;
And now you are the Savior's Breath
And now the Belsen heap.
No turning from the threat of love,
No transcendental leap -
As witnessed here in time and blood
A thousand kisses deep.
 
 
 
this_yearsboy
16 March 2009 @ 06:30 pm
Correction; I really liked Midnight Boom and Last Day of Magic is one hot clip.

I'll be in Melbourne from Thursday night until Tuesday morning.
 
 
this_yearsboy
13 March 2009 @ 07:14 pm
Well the first one first.

New music is not really existent in my life. Well not in the new new music sense. I've been exploring a lot of areas of music that are new for me. I've been exploring the post and pre-war blues especially. Bessie Smith has been my favourite so far. Just reading about her life and listening to the music really makes me appreciate what it must have felt like to be a singer like her in her time. To be a Black Woman in America in the 30's and 40's from a lower class background and to have money and fame! Her fuck you attitude and overt bisexuality really makes me happy, and just hearing her guttural yell on Gimme a Pigfoot (and a bottle of beer) make my skin shiver

This year past has seen me seeing a lot of my idols in the flesh for the first time. The year past have seen two of dreamakers grace the shores: Patti Smith and Leonard Cohen, each moment and movement exquisite. Patti singing 'Free Money 'and Leonard Cohen reciting 'A thousand kisses deep' are two of the most beautiful moments of my life so far. Leonard Cohen especially pressed on me the overwhelming nature of his genius, humility and humour.

It's funny how out of touch I seem to be with music at the time it hits the press. It's a pity, I'll most likely miss a lot of bands I'll grow to love. Maybe that's something I'll try to make an effort about.
 
 
this_yearsboy
11 March 2009 @ 07:14 pm
Everytime I decide that I'm going to start writing in this again there's always a rather large break inbetween the glorious herald and the hordes arrival. Sure sometimes there are a few trickling entries, but nothing of substance. A calm before the storm. Normally this means that I'm stewing over my thoughts as to what could possibly be in this first substantial entry. I spend a lot of my time walking writing out prose in my head, none of which never reaches paper and is always far superior than what stains the white page. I find blank spaces nerveracking when I sit down to write. It's a feeling I get in my chest that's somewhat similar to when someone I care about utters the words "we need to talk" or something equally insideous. Instantly my thoughts race to how to escape the situation as quickly as possible, a flight or fight sort of situation. Although the "fight" option tends to involve me thinking about thinking and depersonalising from the situation. My other defence mechanism is to talk about the situation itself, quickly avoiding anything that the conversation had intended and rendering it impotent through abstraction.

So once again here we are writing about writing. I don't always see this as problematic, but it's a well hashed theme in this journal and in [info]burnt_notfrozen let alone the world at large. So where does that leave us? Bored and slight irritated I'm sure. It appears that anyone I used to know on Livejournal have since left as my friends listing on here is a sea of slashes. Who's left? What would you possibly want to know about my life? What is there to say that could spark some interest. Things have changed a lot since my last entry but what is significant and what isn't? It's a sea of changes that can hardly be bottled into some digestable. Ask me a question. Give me something to sing about.
 
 
this_yearsboy
03 March 2009 @ 06:49 pm
It's rather vapid to go see a band just because you think the fans will be hot right?

Well that's my plan this evening.

Of Montreal here I come.
 
 
this_yearsboy
27 February 2009 @ 07:50 pm
It's 7:50pm. It's a Friday evening. I'm at work, and I've discovered livejournal access.

How did this take so long? I have no idea. I'm sitting here with a long neck of New, drinking my cheeks red, waiting for Work to finish so I can go home.

I think you'll be seeing a lot more of me in these parts.
 
 
this_yearsboy
19 April 2008 @ 06:08 pm
It's funny that I thought that I had this in me. That my feet were so eager to hit the road.

All I find myself after of late is a place to call home, a space to lay my claim. I suppose that for the next few months I'll have to take this desire to the world, to the unexplored spaces that lay ahead of me but know that in my heart of hearts that all my wishes are currently domestic.

For those far away from me, hurry home I miss you greatly. Sydney felt unatural without you.

To the unexplored vastness,

Beau.
 
 
Current Music: Neil Young - The Needle and the Damage Done
 
 
this_yearsboy
30 January 2008 @ 08:00 am
It begins today, at 1:30. No more Sydney for me.
 
 
this_yearsboy
21 January 2008 @ 02:05 pm
For those of you who weren't aware, or who had possibly forgotten, I'm to leave Sydney this friday.

The journey shall be long, but hopefully worthwhile. I wont be static again until I hit Melbourne in July.

For those of you who wish to bid me farewell in a mass gathering, I shall be at the Courthouse in Newtown from 8pm on thursday evening.

Beau
 
 
this_yearsboy
21 November 2007 @ 12:49 am
When you're all alone you catch your breath, you save yourself.
 
 
this_yearsboy
10 September 2007 @ 01:18 pm
Come celebrate Verge arts festival through a all-night Butlerian Discoteque.

It’s where theory, art, performance, music and dancing meld into a conflation of euphoria and social experimentation.

Come undermine the constrained repetition of norms and dance your self into a new world order.

DJ Matt Vaughan, DJ Dropbear, VJ Mim In Boots, Cuntsientious, Mangina Gallery, Death Defying Genderfuck Acts and The Launch of Querelle 2007

$5 entry
Free for USU
Hermann’s Bar: City Rd, Sydney
14th of September
8pm-late
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
 
 
this_yearsboy
19 July 2007 @ 02:46 pm
I've been making some Mix Cd's for you all.

Here is the first one, hope you find it for your liking.
http://www.sendspace.com/file/v0f7f2
Extroversion will be here tomorrow, as uplaoding takes it's time and work is nigh.

Beau.
 
 
 
this_yearsboy
03 July 2007 @ 12:14 pm
Porn store clerks are dreamy, especially one in Newtown.

Best random conversation I've had in some time.

Hoping you're as hungover as I am, but still asleep.

Beau.
 
 
this_yearsboy
24 June 2007 @ 01:54 pm
In case you all missed it, Magic Dirt recently started their own label and thus have been on a spree of experimental noise work and getting back to their grungey selves as seen on Friend in Danger and the other earlier albums. I'm pretty happy for them and for the music that will be coming out of it, and to celebrate such I'll be happily attending their concert. It's on the 27th of July at the Annandale hotel.

Oh and here's a photo

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

P.S.

Let's all move in here and make art and music that's completely banal and self indulgent: http://www.domain.com.au/Public/PropertyDetails.aspx?adid=5328504&s_rid=rent:HaveYouConsidered
 
 
Current Location: Home
Current Music: Bad 40's Musical
 
 
this_yearsboy
16 June 2007 @ 08:08 pm
My turntable is returning to my room, and I've been lent an acoustic guitar.

Someone give me and computer and I'll never see anyone again.
 
 
this_yearsboy
14 June 2007 @ 01:24 pm
So I'm going to be sober until QC.

So very sober.
 
 
Current Location: Home with a heater.
Current Music: Feist
 
 
this_yearsboy
08 June 2007 @ 01:55 pm
Thank you for your purchase
PATRICK WOLF (UK) plus special guests
Friday 6 Jul 2007 9:30 PM

Booking reference Ticket Type Name Email
21524825-n01-017 GEN. ADMISSION STANDING Beau NEwham beau.newham@gmail.com

Total Cost $30.80
GST component $2.80
 
 
this_yearsboy
05 June 2007 @ 04:43 pm


I kinda glad it isn't easily dismissed, but fuck tearing this to pieces will be keeping me awake for the next two weeks.
 
 
Current Music: The Moldy Peaches
 
 
 
 

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